The GGCI Newsletter 2003-2007

GGCI Newsletter Archives 2003-2007

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Mon, 31 Dec 2007 18:06:00 +0000

IMPORTANT NOTE: These are the archives of GGCI Newsletters from 2003-2007. Feel free to browse around. For more current GGCI Newsletters, please visit www.ggci.com/newsletter. Thanks!

4qtr2007 - Not Just Talk! Newsletter

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 12:38:00 +0000

Table of Contents - 4qtr2007 - Not Just Talk! Newsletter

Article Review: The Real Reason People Won’t Change
Authentically Munch
Ask the Coach: A Whiter Shade of Pale
Notable Quotables: Great Things I Didn't Say (First)
What's News at GottaGettaCoach!?
GottaGettaBlog! Highlights

4qtr2007 - Article Review - The Real Reason People Won't Change

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 12:32:00 +0000

Article Review: The Real Reason People Won’t Change
Robert Kegan And Lisa Laskow Lahey
Harvard Business Review (reprint R0110E)

So what is the real reason people won’t change? To bottom line it,

"It’s a psychological dynamic called a “competing commitment,” and until managers understand how it works and the ways to overcome it, they can’t do a
thing about change-resistant employees."

When people resist change, it’s not necessarily because they’re opposed to it. It’s not even necessarily because they’re lazy or inattentive to it, either. Rather, it’s because they have one or more hidden beliefs that directly conflict with them working toward meaningful change.

Example:

People often don’t collaborate even though they truly believe in teamwork. Why? Because they’re also dedicated to avoiding the confrontations that are typically intrinsic to any team-based activity. So, push come to shove, they never fully engage in the collaborative process for fear of that probable confrontation and what that means to them.

Oftentimes, though, it’s not readily apparent what the conflict is – or that a conflict even exists. So to unwind things, the authors have developed an interesting three-stage process to help figure out what’s in the way:

Through a series of key questions, managers can guide employees to uncover any competing commitments.
Employees can then examine these competing commitments to determine the Underlying Assumptions inherent in them.
Based on this new awareness, employees can then start changing their behaviors accordingly.

Uncovering Competing Commitments

The key questions recommended for guiding the uncovering process are as follows:

What would you like to see changed at work, so that you could be more effective or so that work would be more satisfying?
What commitments does your complaint imply?
What are you doing, or not doing, that is keeping your commitment from being more fully realized?
If you imagine doing the opposite of the undermining behavior, do you detect in yourself any discomfort, worry, or vague fear?
By engaging in this undermining behavior, what worrisome outcomes are you committed to preventing?

It’s important to realize that competing commitments do not necessarily reflect weakness or incompetence on anyone’s part. So, managers, don’t go there. Competing commitments are merely just a form of self-protection, and in that context, they make total sense. (e.g. If you want to avoid confrontation, avoid collaboration because collaboration results in confrontation.) Of course the follow-up question to ask is this: What are you protecting yourself from? What are you assuming will happen as a result of a confrontation?

Interestingly, once people start looking at things this way, it’s fairly easy for them to identify (and admit) what they are protecting themselves from. And once they identify that, most are ready to take some immediate action to overcome it.

But the authors suggest that a manager not press for behavioral change just yet. Rather, managers should encourage the employee to first notice his/her current behavior in light of now knowing about his/her competing commitments, Underlying Assumptions, and self-protecting mechanisms. That way, s/he can also look for what I like to call irrefutable evidence that their long-held assumptions might no longer be valid. (Who hasn’t found that a type of food they once thought they didn’t like was actually quite tasty?!) This can open whole new world of possibility for someone as one can use this as an opportunity to reflect on what caused these specific protection mechanisms to be created in the first place.

Understanding the circumstances that created the Underlying Assumptions can be very helpful in freeing oneself from them. And from there, meaningful change is not only doable, but often preferred to the status quo.

4qtr2007 - Authentically Munch

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 12:27:00 +0000

According to NYMag.com, Law & Order character, Detective John Munch, “is the longest-running character on any American drama still on the air. What's more … [since January 1993] the aforementioned Detective Munch has appeared in no less than nine different television shows.”

For you trivia fans, the nine shows are:

Law & Order
Law & Order Special Victims Unit
Sesame Street (my personal favorite!)
Arrested Development
Law & Order: Trial by Jury
The Beat
Homicide: Life on the Street
The X Files
The Lone Gunmen

What’s particularly interesting to me – aside from being a long time Belzer fan – is that it speaks to a frequent life coach topic: Authenticity.

It’s one thing to show up. Indeed, as Woody Allen says, “Eighty percent of success is showing up.” Authenticity, though, speaks to how we show up. Munch is very consistent in that regard. “I yam what I yam,” both he and Popeye the Sailorman would both say, albeit with slightly different affects.

Munch – and Popeye, for that matter – has a definite personality. But authenticity is more than just personality. Authenticity is about being completely comfortable in one’s own skin without fear of what others might think, and without need to unduly impress anyone with it.

So how does one become completely comfortable in one’s own skin without fear of what others might think? And how does one avoid overdoing the whole authenticity thing?

Step One – Realize that you have a right to be comfortable in your own skin. We really do have that right, you know, – We yam who we yam?! – even if it feels completely unbelievable at times. Authenticity is about “showing up” as who we are, not just as some cardboard cutout of who we think we should be. Surely Detective Munch would agree – and he’s not even a real person!

Step Two – Own your skin. Feel what it’s like. Note what works for you, and what doesn’t. Understand what makes it easier for you to just be yourself, as well as what makes it more difficult. Look for patterns and explanations, and how they all might interrelate.

Step Three: Actively calibrate. Something helpful to remember about becoming more comfortable in your own skin is that you really don’t need to get it exactly right at first, you just need to understand what types of things will move you closer to, or farther away from, it so you can calibrate accordingly.

Here’s a fun game to practice calibrating: Pick a number between one and 100; ask someone to guess it; when they do, tell them only to guess higher, or lower, until they get it exactly right; count how many guesses it takes for them to get it exactly right. This is how we work toward homeostasis – when we guess too high, we back it off a bit, and when we guess to low, we up it from there.

As with home heating and cooling, sometimes we need to heat up how we’re interacting with the world, sometimes we need to cool it down a bit, and sometimes, Goldilocks, it’s just right. And each little calibration helps.

A word of warning: Some people confuse comfort in their own skin with vanity, as if to say, “Look how authentic I’m being!” The ultimate litmus, then, is this: If you’re ego is what’s really loving how well you calibrate, there’s likely still more work to do. But if your heart loves it, then you’re likely on the right track.

Detective Munch already understands that – as do his writers.

4tr2007 - Ask the Coach: A Whiter Shade of Pale

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 12:20:00 +0000

Question: Barry, I'm so frustrated. Try as I might to see things otherwise, I’m such a Black and White thinker. What can I do to open my eyes to other possibilities when problem-solving?

Answer: Here’s something that often helps the B&W types: Shades of grey!

Seriously, anyone who’s able to discern black from white, as you are, certainly understands that what they’re discerning from is actually shades of grey. If you allow yourself to play with that notion a bit you’ll soon likely notice that you already see other possibilities – you’re just discounting them a bit prematurely, that’s all.

A good question to ask is this: “Okay, I see the black and white of it all, but what are some of the grey tones I’m also seeing? “

Too, it’s often helpful to look at the whiter side of the spectrum. Did you know, for instance, that there are about a zillion shades in the white palette?! Here, courtesy of Benjamin Moore, (http://www.benjaminmoore.ca/colours/offwhite.aspx) is quite a few of them.

Of course the deeper issue has nothing to do with colors at all really – although a nice Bordeaux Red / Dill Weed Green combination is quite smart-looking for the coming cooler months! What’s really needed here is a way to expand your thinking in a way that encourages your creativity to kick in.

An approach that’s often helpful in getting things going is the pick-a-metaphor-and-go game. It works like this:

Close your eyes, take a few deep, cleansing breaths.
Open your eyes and allow them to settle on something/anything.
That something is the metaphor you can use to stimulate your creativity.

Example #1: You open your eyes, look around, and find your gaze focusing on your backyard. Stoke your creativity by asking some imaginative questions like theses:

Thinking about that idea I’ve been struggling with, what part could clearly use a little more watering?!
All things being equal, what parts need to be mown or trimmed a bit?!
What would make my idea that much more lush and green?!

Example #2: You open your eyes, look around, and find your gaze focusing on your kitchen freezer. Stoke your creativity by asking some off-the-wall questions like theses:

My current idea is too vanilla so what would adding a nice chocolate mocha fudge swirl do to it?!
For that matter, what would turn the whole thing into a delicious banana split sundae?!
And what little something extra could I add to my idea as a cherry on top?

Example #3: You open your eyes, look around, and find your gaze focusing on a yellow highlighter sitting on your desk. Stoke your creativity by asking some silly-little questions like theses:

What parts of my idea do I want to particularly highlight for others?
Given that the color yellow is sometimes associated with cowardice and other times associated with peace and happiness, what part of my idea makes me the most nervous, and what do I need to modify to make me happier with it?
How might the impact of my idea change if I changed its color or some other physical attribute?

While the pick-a-metaphor-and-go game might not immediately provide you with the answers you’re looking for, it likely will bring a smile to your face, which is very helpful when trying to look at things in terms other than simple blacks and whites.

4qtr2007 - Notable Quotables: Great Things I Didn't Say (First)

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 12:15:00 +0000

“Begin challenging your own assumptions. Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in awhile, or the light won't come in.” - Alan Alda
“The life of my personal has nothing to do with me,” - Claire Danes
“I Eats All Me Spinach, And Takes To The Finish, I'm Popeye The Sailor Man! Toot! Toot!” – Popeye, the Sailorman
“He's very comfortable in his own skin, ... That's his personality. When you're true to self like that, it comes across well.” - Jeff Van Gundy
“Colors, like features, follow the changes of the emotions.” – Pablo Picasso
“We've been dreaming in color since 1883.” – Benjamin Moore, the Paint-man

4qtr2007 - GottaGettaBlog! Highlights

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 12:06:00 +0000

I've been using GottaGettaBlog! as a vehicle to capture news, notes, and musings about coaching, mentoring, and getting more from YOUR Untapped Potential - along with whatever other stuff I happen to find amusing and/or thought-provoking - since June of 2003.Highlighted postings from last quarter are listed below - just follow the links:

from July 2007

from August 2007

from September 2007

Your on-line comments at GottaGettaBlog! are both welcomed and encouraged. To receive weekly digests of new GottaGettaBlog! postings, update your subscription here.

4qtr2007 - What's News at GottaGettaCoach!?

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 12:03:00 +0000

Barry Zweibel is interviewed for an article on Lessons in Leadership in the September/October issue of INSIGHT, the magazine of the Illinois CPA Society.
GottaGettaCoach! celebrates its seventh anniversary!

3qtr2007 - Not Just Talk! Newsletter

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 18:59:00 +0000

Table of Contents - 3qtr2007 - Not Just Talk! Newsletter

Book Review - Juicing the Orange
Ask the Coach: More Better Creativity
Notable Quotables: Great Things I Didn't Say (First)
What's News at GottaGettaCoach!?
GottaGettaBlog! Highlights

3qtr2007 - Book Review - Juicing the Orange

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 18:58:00 +0000

Title: Juicing the Orange: How to Turn Creativity into a Powerful Business Advantage
Authors: Pat Fallon & Fred Senn
ISBN: 1-59139-927-0

Okay, this is another in a series of "Inside Secrets" books written by seasoned advertising pros about their unique strategies and resultant successes. And I'll admit that I really like books like this. (Other good ones include: Lovemarks: The Future Beyond Brands, by Kevin Robers, CEO of Saatchi & Saatchi; and The Trendmaster's Guide, by Robyn Waters, former VP of Trend, Design, and Product Development at Target.) Advertising-folk are just so creative and upbeat when things are going right.

What I particularly like about this book - and the Fallon Worldwide agency - though, is that so many of the client case studies highlighted are for products and companies that I not only recognize, but actually like - something I directly attribute to their, ahem, really good advertising. Examples, include:

Those animated, music-only, story-telling tv commercials for United Airlines
Those "No, but i did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night" ads
Buddy Lee blue jean commercials
The way that BMW cross marketed with Bond, James Bond
Those wacky Virgin Mobile holiday ads
and more

Another favorite was for a barber shop in NYC called "7 South 8th for Hair," a small business with very little money for advertising. It was Fallon's very first account and they really wanted to show how they could be creative AND effective. So, they bought a few poster spaces at bus stops near the barbershop and, on them, featured big pictures of somebody famous with really bad hair ... and a cleverly related tag line:

Moe Howard (of Three Stooges fame) - "A bad haircut is no laughing matter."
Albert Einstein - "A bad haircut can make anyone look dumb."
Susan B. Anthony (from the failed $1 coin) - "A bad haircut can take you out of circulation."

Fallon's Inside Secret? What they call the Seven Principles of Creative Leverage:

Always start from scratch.
Demand a ruthlessly simple definition of the business problem.
Discover a proprietary emotion.
Focus on the size of the idea, not the size of the budget.
Seek out strategic risks.
Collaborate or perish.
Listen hard to your customers (then listen some more).

It struck me that these seven principles can apply to far more than just advertising. I know many of them seem to naturally show up in my coaching conversations with clients, for instance. But think about it in terms of furthering important business initiatives, as well:

"We believe that you have more creativity in your organization than you realize, and we believe that you can find it, develop it, and use it more effectively. " (page 20)

They're probably right, you know.

Here are a few other interesting creative advertising ideas that applies to people at work - and in life:

"Our goal as an organization is to understand culture so well that we can use its idioms and nuances to transcend blatant selling messages." (page 65)
"You can change people's minds, but only if they first give you permission, and that won't happen if they think you're a joke." (page 78)
"The door to most business people's right brain is through their left brain. First the smart, then the exciting. (The consumer, ironically, wants it just the other way around.)" (page 97)
"Just as a sports team needs a handful of players who have been to the playoffs, a marketing team needs members who understand the hard work and commitment it takes to make the most of an idea." (page 123)

Success in advertising, as in business - and in life - really does required more than just talking the walk.

"...if we truly valued our culture, then it wasn't enough to hire brains and talent. we had to cherish the people who bets embodied our ideals. We call them culture players." (page 194)

And that's why I like this book - it not only had cool advertising stories and interesting creative strategies, but it offered some important conclusions for what it takes to be a success across a wide variety of venues.

3qtr2007 - Ask the Coach: More Better Creativity

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 18:57:00 +0000

Question: Barry, I'm stuck. I want to be more creative in what I do, but I just can't figure out how to do it. Everything I come up with is, well, b-o-r-i-n-g. What am I doing wrong?

Answer: As counter-intuitive as it may seem, in situations like this, success often comes more from trying less, than from trying harder. And the best way that I've found to do that is to F-R-E-E Your Mind:

F as in Forget - Sure you've got all sorts of pressures and deadlines you're worried about, but Step One is to let all that go and forget about it for a little while. Think of this step as clearing the canvas. Tabula rasa.
R as in Remember - Now that you've cleared your mind, entertain a memory of a favorite noun (person, place, or thing) from your past. The farther back in time you go, the better - something from your innocent youth (your Wonder Years) would be ideal.
E as in Enjoy - Spend a few moments enjoying your recollection, with all your senses. Remember what it looked like, sounded like, who was there. Remember the colors, textures, flavors, what it felt like. Remember it in as much detail as you possibly can and reconnect with some of that same child-like zeal you had way back when. Breathe in a few times. Good deep breaths. And big, full, exhales. Ahhhhhhhhhh!
E as in Expand - Now from that relaxed and happy place, expand your thinking to the problem or issue you've been trying to get creative about. Ask your inner-child for some advice: What would he do? What does she suggest? Who else from your past would have some good, crazy, funny, absurd, ideas to share?! Your best friend? The kid next door? The neighbor's dog that loved barking at the mailman?! See what 'pops'; you may be pleasantly surprised.

When we connect back to our past, we F-R-E-E our minds from all the noise and static of today that keeps us from being our natural, creative, selves.

Hmmm. Makes me wonder. Whatever happened to my old buddy, Jimmy Sharkey? Jimmy, you out there?!

3qtr2007 - Notable Quotables: Great Things I Didn't Say (First)

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 18:55:00 +0000

"Remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it." - Henry Ford
"Life is "trying things to see if they work." - Ray Bradbury
"Creativity requires the courage to let go of certainties." - Erich Fromm
"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new." - Albert Einstein
"If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe." - Carl Sagan
"Our genius ain't appreciated around here... let's scram!" - Moe (to Larry and Curley)

3qtr2007 - GottaGettaBlog! Highlights

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 18:54:00 +0000

from April 2007

from May 2007

from June 2007

Your on-line comments at GottaGettaBlog! are both welcomed and encouraged. To receive weekly digests of new GottaGettaBlog! postings, update your subscription here.

3qtr2007 - What's News at GottaGettaCoach!?

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 18:51:00 +0000

Princess Cruises, one of the premiere cruise lines in the world, asked Barry Zweibel to be one of their "guest authors" publishing a reworked version of Network Your Way to New Clients, having geared it specifically for their travel agency readership.
Barry Zweibel was interviewed for an article on Lessons in Leadership to appear in an upcoming issue of INSIGHT, the magazine of the Illinois CPA Society.
Farmers Insurance Group expanded its executive coaching initiative with GottaGettaCoach!
Barry Zweibel was quoted in a feature article at http://jobs.aol.com/ called, "How to Succeed Like a Workaholic".
Pivot Points -- a New Tool for Job Searchers, an article written by Barry Zweibel and published in 2005 by TheLadders.com, was scheduled to be reprinted in an upcoming issue of Hispanic Network magazine.
Auxis, Inc. extended its executive coaching initiative with GottaGettaCoach!
Barry Zweibel was interviewed for an article scheduled to be published by CareerBuilder.com.

2qtr2007 - Not Just Talk! Newsletter

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 12:33:00 +0000

Table of Contents - 2qtr2007 - Not Just Talk! Newsletter

Feature Article: 119 Steps
Notable Quotables: Great Things I Didn't Say First
Feature Article: Ask the Coach
What's News at GottaGettaCoach!?
GottaGettaBlog! Weblog Highlights

2qtr2007 - 119 Small Steps

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 12:31:00 +0000

It's amazing how much good information is out there on the Internet just a-waiting for us to find. Here's some more of it, courtesy of the Steps to a Healthier U.S. initiative from the
U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, called Small Steps:

Walk to work.
Use fat free milk over whole milk.
Do sit-ups in front of the TV.
Walk during lunch hour.
Drink water before a meal.
Eat leaner red meat & poultry.
Eat half your dessert.
Walk instead of driving whenever you can.
Take family walk after dinner.
Skate to work instead of driving.
Avoid food portions larger than your fist.
Mow lawn with push mower.
Increase the fiber in your diet.
Walk to your place of worship instead of driving.
Walk kids to school.
Get a dog and walk it.
Join an exercise group.
Drink diet soda.
Replace Sunday drive with Sunday walk.
Do yard work.
Eat off smaller plates.
Get off a stop early & walk.
Don't eat late at night.
Skip seconds.
Work around the house.
Skip buffets.
Grill, steam or bake instead of frying.
Bicycle to the store instead of driving.
Take dog to the park.
Ask your doctor about taking a multi-vitamin.
Go for a half-hour walk instead of watching TV.
Use vegetable oils over solid fats.
More carrots, less cake.
Fetch the newspaper yourself.
Sit up straight at work.
Wash the car by hand.
Don't skip meals.
Eat more celery sticks.
Run when running errands.
Pace the sidelines at kids' athletic games.
Take wheels off luggage.
Choose an activity that fits into your daily life.
Try your burger with just lettuce, tomato, and onion.
Ask a friend to exercise with you.
Make time in your day for physical activity.
Exercise with a video if the weather is bad.
Bike to the barbershop or beauty salon instead of driving.
Keep to a regular eating schedule.
If you find it difficult to be active after work, try it before work.
Take a walk or do desk exercises instead of a cigarette or coffee break.
Perform gardening or home repair activities.
Avoid laborsaving devices.
Take small trips on foot to get your body moving.
Play with your kids 30 minutes a day.
Dance to music.
Keep a pair of comfortable walking or running shoes in your car and office.
Make a Saturday morning walk a group habit.
Walk briskly in the mall.
Choose activities you enjoy & you'll be more likely to stick with them.
Stretch before bed to give you more energy when you wake.
Take the long way to the water cooler.
Explore new physical activities.
Vary your activities, for interest and to broaden the range of benefits.
Reward and acknowledge your efforts.
Choose fruit for dessert.
Consume alcoholic beverages in moderation, if at all.
Take stairs instead of the escalator.
Conduct an inventory of your meal/snack and physical activity patterns.
Share an entree with a friend.
Grill fruits or vegetables.
Eat before grocery shopping.
Choose a checkout line without a candy display.
Make a grocery list before you shop.
Buy 100% fruit juices over soda and sugary drinks.
Stay active in winter. Play with your kids.
Flavor foods with herbs, spices, and other low fat seasonings.
Remove skin from poultry before cooking to lower fat content.
Eat before you get too hungry.
Don't skip breakfast.
Stop eating when you are full.
Snack on fruits and vegetables.
Top your favorite cereal with apples or bananas.
Try brown rice or whole-wheat pasta.
Include several servings of whole grain food daily.
When eating out, choose a small or medium portion.
If main dishes are too big, choose an appetizer or a side dish instead.
Ask for salad dressing "on the side".
Don't take seconds.
Park farther from destination and walk.
Try a green salad instead of fries.
Bake or broil fish.
Walk instead of sitting around.
Eat sweet foods in small amounts.
Take your dog on longer walks.
Drink lots of water.
Cut back on added fats or oils in cooking or spreads.
Walk the beach instead of sunbathing.
Walk to a co-worker's desk instead of emailing or calling them.
Carry your groceries instead of pushing a cart.
Use a snow shovel instead of a snow blower.
Cut high-calorie foods like cheese and chocolate into smaller pieces and only eat a few pieces.
Use nonfat or low-fat sour cream, mayo, sauces, dressings, and other condiments.
Replace sugar sweetened beverages with water and add a twist of lemon or lime.
Replace high-saturated fat/high calorie seasonings with herbs grown in a small herb garden in your kitchen window.
Refrigerate prepared soups before you eat them. As the soup cools, the fat will rise to the top. Skim it off the surface for reduced fat content.
When eating out, ask your server to put half your entrée in a to-go bag.
Substitute vegetables for other ingredients in your sandwich.
Every time you eat a meal, sit down, chew slowly, and pay attention to flavors and textures.
Try a new fruit or vegetable (ever had jicama, plantain, bok choy, starfruit or papaya?)
Make up a batch of brownies with applesauce instead of oil or shortening.
Instead of eating out, bring a healthy, low calorie lunch to work.
Ask your sweetie to bring you fruit or flowers instead of chocolate.
Speak up for the salad bar when your coworkers are picking a restaurant for lunch, and remember calories count, so pay attention to how much and what you eat.
When walking, go up the hills instead of around them.
Walk briskly through the mall and shop 'til you drop ... pounds.
Clean your closet and donate clothes that are too big.
Take your body measurements to gauge progress.
Buy a set of hand weights and play a round of Simon Says with your kids - you do it with the weights, they do without.
Swim with your kids.

2qtr2007 - Notable Quotables: Great Things I Didn't Say First!

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 12:30:00 +0000

George Konrad: Courage is an accumulation of small steps.
Susan Taylor: Use missteps as stepping stones to deeper understanding and greater achievement.
Jimmy Buffett: Indecision may or may not be my problem.
Francois Gautier: More important than the quest for certainty is the quest for clarity.
G. W. F. Hegel: Thus to be independent of public opinion is the first formal condition of achieving anything great.
William James: The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook.

2qtr2007 - Ask the Coach: Better Decision Making

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 12:28:00 +0000

Question: Hey Beezee. Whenever I ask my friends, family, and colleagues for their suggestions as to how I should handle a given situation, I end up with so much conflicting advice that I'm even more confused than when I started. I think it's important to gather as much information before making important decisions. but this isn't working. What's a better way?

Answer: Good for you for recognizing that the approach you're taking isn't giving you the results you're looking for. As Albert Einstein said,

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."

Consider changing the type of information you're requesting - or the way that you're requesting it. It's likely that you're asking a "What do you think I should do?" type question, or some variation thereof. The problem with this approach, as you noted, is that it rarely leads to consensus or clarity - you just get a bunch of differing and often conflicting opinions to filter through.

Rather than finding out what others would do if they were you, use these interactions to get clearer on what you need for you to make the decision. In other words, focus on asking for the objective data do you need to help you decide.

Example: You want to buy a car. Rather than asking others, "What car do you think I should buy?", first ask yourself, "What would affect my decision one way or another?"

price?
safety?
reliability?
resale value?
fuel efficiency?
??

List your criteria, whatever it may be. Then ask people specifically about those things: How much should I expect to pay for a good used car? How important are crash test results? Which cars does Consumer Reports rate highly from a reliability standpoint? At what point does it make sense to trade in one car for another one? What else is important in deciding on a car to buy? Answers to these types of questions are likely to inform rather than confuse you.

In review:

Decide what are the important elements for you to use as a basis for your decision.
Gather information with respect to those elements.
Create a short list of possible choices.
Evaluate each choice with respect to the decision elements you've chosen.
Decide.

By the way, a very helpful tool to assist you with this is a Decision Matrix.

And don't worry if it takes a while to gather the information you need to decide. As Einstein also said,

"The important thing is not to stop questioning."

Hope this helps.

2qtr2007 - What's News at GottaGettaCoach!?

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 12:27:00 +0000

News and Highlights from last quarter:

The Dangerous Allure of Trust, an article written by Barry Zweibel and published last year in Effective Executive magazine about why managers should NOT want their direct reports to trust them, has been selected by ICFAI Publications/Books for inclusion in an upcoming professional reference book on Employee Trust: Strategies and Cases.
The New Coach Connection, an on-line community of "new and experienced coaches who are seeking ways to collaborate, connect and create awesome experiences in the coaching profession," interviewed Barry Zweibel as part of an ongoing blog series about experienced and recognized life coaches.
Barry Zweibel, president and founder of GottaGettaCoach!, Inc., has been awarded the Master Certified Coach (MCC) credential by the International Coach Federation (ICF). The MCC is the highest, and most prestigious, designation available through the ICF, a globally-recognized, independent, certification body for professional coaches. The ICF has more than 11,000 members in 80 countries, and less than 5% of its membership -- and less than 2% of all coaches worldwide -- have achieved this MCC distinction.
Burdened by Bad Habits - Barry Zweibel is interviewed about breaking bad habits in Columbia College's Echo Magazine, including his Ten Top Tips for getting over bad habits.
Bridges to Fulfillment - How Life Coaches Help Close Gaps Between Dreams and Reality. An article published in Elite Magazine that interviews Barry Zweibel and one of his clients about how coaching works.

2qtr2007 - GottaGettaBlog! Highlights

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 12:26:00 +0000

I've been using GottaGettaBlog! as a vehicle to capture news, notes, and musings about coaching, mentoring, and getting more from YOUR Untapped Potential - along with whatever other stuff I happen to find amusing and/or thought-provoking - since June of 2003.

Highlighted postings from last quarter are listed below - just follow the links:

from January 2007

from Feburary 2007

from March 2007

Your on-line comments at GottaGettaBlog! are both welcomed and encouraged. To receive weekly digests of new GottaGettaBlog! postings, update your subscription here.

1qtr2007 - Not Just Talk! Newsletter

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Jan 2007 18:58:00 +0000

Table of Contents - 1qtr2007 - Not Just Talk! Newsletter

Feature Article: Book Review - Mindless Eating, by Brian Wansink, Ph.D.
Notable Quotables: Great Things I Didn't Say First
Feature Article: Ask the Coach
What's News at GottaGettaCoach!?
GottaGettaBlog! Weblog Highlights

1qtr2007 - Book Review - Mindless Eating

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Jan 2007 18:57:00 +0000

Title: Mindless Eating: Why We Eat More Than We Should
Author: Brian Wansink, Ph.D.

"The average Person makes well over 200 decisions about food every day. Breakfast or no breakfast? Pop-Tart or bagel? Part of it or all of it? Kitchen or car?" So says the author, a Stanford Ph.D. and the director of the Cornell University Food and Brand Lab. "Yet out of these 200-plus food decisions, most we cannot really explain."

"Traditional diet books focus on what dietitians and health practitioners know. This book focuses on what psychologists and marketeers know." As such, it's not a book about "dietary extremism." Rather, it's about "reengineering" your food environment so that it doesn't work against you - 200-plus times a day - without you even knowing it.

From the jacket sleeve: "Using ingenious, fun, and sometimes downright fiendishly clever experiments like the 'bottomless soup bowl,' Wansink takes us on a fascinating tour of the secret dynamics behind our dietary habits." Yes he does. And at the end of each chapter, he provides us with Reengineering Strategies to implement what we now know:

Reengineering Strategy #1: Think 20% - More or Less - For regular meals, dish out 20% less than you think you might want; for fruits and vegetables, think 20% more.
Reengineering Strategy #2: See All You Eat - See it before you eat it (when people "pre-plate" their food, they eat 14% less than when they take smaller amounts and go back for seconds or thirds); see it while you eat it (think popcorn and candy at the movie theatre).
Reengineering Strategy #3: Be Your Own Tablescaper - Mini-size your boxes and bowls (the bigger the package you pour from, the more you eat: 20% to 30% more for most people, so repackage your jumbo boxes into smaller Ziploc bags or Tupperware containers); become an illusionist (six ounces of goulash on an 8-inch plate is a nice-size serving, but six ounces on a 12-inch plate looks like a tiny appetizer).
Reengineering Strategy #4: Make Overeating a Hassle - Don't bring serving dishes to the table; de-convenience tempting foods (by putting them in the back of the fridge or cupboard); snack only on a plate (making it less convenient to serve, eat, and clean up after an impulse snack).
Reengineering Strategy #5: Create Distraction-Free Eating Scripts - Re script your diet danger zones (eg: chew a stick of gum after work rather than heading for the fridge); serve yourself before you snack (avoid eating out of the box, bag, or serving bowl).
Reengineering Strategy #6: Create Expectations That Make You a Better Cook - Fix the atmosphere when you fix the food (spend the last 15 minutes of prep time on "soft" and "nice" - soft lights, soft music, soft color, nice plates, nice tablecloth, nice glasses); enhance your description of "what's for dinner?" (add words like succulent, homemade, traditional, Cajun, and they'll like your food a whole lot more - and snack a whole lot less).
Reengineering Strategy #7: Make Comfort Foods More Comforting - Don't deprive yourself (just eat them in smaller amounts); rewire your comfort foods (from 'death by chocolate' sundaes to a smaller bowl of ice cream with fresh strawberries).
Reengineering Strategy #8: Crown yourself as the Official Gatekeeper - Don't use food to reward or punish; use the half-plate rule (half of your plate for proteins and starches; half of your plate for fruit and veggies); make serving sizes official (repackage single-servings in Baggies or Saran Wrap).
Reengineering Strategy #9: Portion-Size Me - Beware of the health halo (the better the food, the worse the extras: think Subway - some of their 'naked' sandwiches may be healthy, but not when you add the cheese and dressings, etc.); Beware of super-sizing (think McDonald's).

Wansink recommends you go through this list and pick three changes to focus on - no more; no less. More than three and it'll feel like a diet. Do that for 28 days and you'll be well on your way to making smarter eating mindless.

I recommend you pick up a copy of Mindless Eating.

1qtr2007 - Ask the Coach: Better Sleep

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Jan 2007 18:57:00 +0000

Question: Hey Coach! Sometimes I just can't seem to fall asleep at night. I toss and turn and keep reviewing things over and over again. Not surprisingly, when I finally do fall asleep it's too little too late. Suggestions?

Answer: Some people can fall asleep at the drop of a hat; others need more time to settle down before settling in for the night. Here are some things you may want to try. While they all may not work for you, quite likely some combination will serve their purpose of getting you into Zzz land that much sooner:

Getting Ready for Bed:

Stop drinking caffeinated coffee and soft drinks progressively earlier in the day until you find the latest time in the day that they affect your sleep. For some people, that's 6pm; for others, though, it can be as early as 12 noon.
Set your alarm clock 3-7 minutes fast. This 'space time' will help you 'fool' your subconscious into thinking you'll be getting up later than you really will be, which will make it easier to relax when getting into bed. Which would you rather see: an alarm going off at 5:57am or one that goes off at 6:03am? It's not about the extra six minutes; it's about the calming perception of not having to get up at 5-something in the morning!
Establish a bedtime ritual. Maybe it's quietly reading for 30-minutes. Maybe it's listening to some soothing music. It might be taking a shower. It might even be writing out your plans or ideas for the next day so you don't have to worry you'll forget them before morning. The key is to make this end-of-day ritual a routine part of your day - like brushing your teeth or turning on your alarm clock.

Waking up in the Morning:

Regarding alarm clocks, stop using the snooze button. It's one of the worst add-ons to one of the best inventions ever. Consider: the purpose of an alarm clock is what? To wake you up. And the purpose of the snooze button is what? To not wake you up! Wanna sleep a bit later? Fine. Set the alarm clock to ring or buzz or radio or cd later. But get in the habit of getting out of bed as soon as the alarm clock goes off. Make it a rule you abide by.
As soon as the alarm clock goes off, sit up and put your two feet on the floor. Then take a few deep breaths - breathe in for a 3-count; breathe out for a 4-count - put a smile on your face, and stand up.
Reviewing a list of affirmations you've prepared or things you're grateful for helps get your day off to a great start, as well.

Waking up in the Middle of the Night:

Keep a cup of water on your nightstand so if you wake up in the middle of the night you can take a sip or two and go back to bed not feeling so parched.
Here's another back-to-sleep technique - a variant of counting sheep: take a virtual tour of a house or apartment you used to lived in. Imagine yourself walking room by room and 'see' as much detail as you possibly can.
Keep a note pad (and pen) on your nightstand (I use 3x5 note cards) so you can write down what's bothering you, knowing that you don't have to think about it anymore until morning, when you can remind yourself about it by reading your note(s).
Remind yourself that the purpose of sleep is to rest your body as well as you mind. So if you can't seem to turn off your brain, consciously focus it on helping your body get the rest it needs. Systematically tense and relax each part of your body. Let your body feel the rejuvenate effects of stillness. Imagine it smiling back at you in appreciation for helping it recharge this way.
If all else fails, get out of bed. Better to be up and about really early than tossing and turning all night. You might find it to be a particularly productive time for you. And, it's likely that you'll be plenty-tired the next night.

Other ideas? Surely there are. Ask around to find out what other techniques people use. And if you've got a good one, post it here for others to benefit from.

Good? G'nite, then.

1qtr2007 - Notable Quotables: Great Things I Didn't Say First!

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Jan 2007 18:56:00 +0000

Chrisopher Morley: “No man is lonely eating spaghetti; it requires so much attention.”
Edmund Burke: “Reading without reflecting is like eating without digesting.”
Dennis Miller: “You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven okay?”
Miss Piggy: "Never eat more than you can lift."
William Blake: “Think in the morning. Act in the noon. Eat in the evening. Sleep in the night.”
Ellen Goodman: "Most people do not consider dawn to be an attractive experience - unless they are still up."
Baltasar Gracian: "It is better to sleep on things beforehand than lie awake about them afterward. "
Charles M. Schultz: "Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?"Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."

1qtr2007 - New Product Offerings

noreply@blogger.com (Barry Zweibel) — Fri, 05 Jan 2007 18:55:00 +0000

I know you're busy. I also know that busy people often appreciate time-saving ideas to help them get more done. To that end, GottaGettaCoach! is pleased to announce these time-saving links to help you do better and enjoy life more:

Simple Audiobooks - The #1 audiobook service on the web. Choose from over 22,000 titles and a variety of pricing plans. Rent. Buy. Download. Listen.
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Magazine subscriptions - With 1,500 magazines to choose from, including the best titles, you can pick a few new magazines to enjoy and consolidate your subscriptions all in one place.
Napoleon Hill's Science of Personal Achievement - This is my absolute favorite self-development audio series. Napoleon Hill devoted his life to studying the science of personal achievement, analyzing the success of more than 500 of the 20th Century’s greatest achievers. His exhaustive research proved that the essence of success lies within 17 simple principles that, when used together, serve as an infallible formula for achievement.

Check 'em out! And if you have some particular resources that you'd like to recommend, please let me know.